Truthfully, I think we spent our summer (well, at least a couple months of it) working on paperwork for the adoption... and then more paperwork for the adoption... and then... Well, you get the picture.
August just flew by! Between pre-teen camp, family reunions, keeping up with the garden (or not) and adoption mayhem, it's gone! And it doesn't look like September will go any slower...
And now, the panic is setting in. For those of you who haven't yet heard... WE RECEIVED A REFERRAL!!!!! In just a matter of months, we will be traveling to China to bring our son home! I can't believe it! It's been such a dream these past two and a half years - one that I'm not sure I believed would ever come true.
But here it is!!!!! And I'm excited and scared and nervous - all those things first-time parents are. And I'm a bit panicked, because we still are not finished with the upstairs! Our son's room is done, and the bathroom is done (that's pretty important!), but our potential bedroom is still a disaster area. Although, it's not as much of a disaster area as it was last week. Brian was so diligent last weekend, and he carried armloads of tools and construction material and "stuff" to the basement, to the garage and to the trash. You can actually see the floor and most of the walls now! :-) But there's still so much work to do!
And, while I'm excited and panicked and all those other things, I'm also concerned. You see, our son has a profound hearing loss. We have spoken with a specialist who feels that a cochlear implant would help him immensely, but I'm still concerned. I'm worried that I won't be able to learn enough sign language, or learn it well enough, to teach him to communicate (until we can arrange for the implant). How will we bond? How quickly will he learn American Sign Language, when he's had no language whatsoever at the orphanage? Will he know what I mean when I tell him that I love him (in ASL)? I know that children are resilient, and they soak up knowledge like sponges. I also know that institutionalized children come with extra baggage all their own. But what I don't know is how that baggage will affect our son and his ability to learn and bond/attach with Brian and me.
But I know, for a fact, that ALL things are possible with God! I have seen His hand throughout this adoption process, and I know that His plan for our family is just what it should be, because He knows best! And I pray that our son knows how to love and be loved, and that he will blossom in our family, and that we can teach him to love God's Way, and that we can give him every opportunity for learning and exploring and reaching his full potential.
Here's to all the uncertainties of parenting! And to the certainty that our loving, almighty God is always in control!